I'm writing this because I saw Miao's request for updating. My dear, you just have saved a blog's life.
Not only due to the criminally huge amounts of work and a power outage that has gone on for a whole week, but a mounting depression that is fighting to conquer the good parts of my brain.
I guess it happens to everyone, even people who have managed to grasp what we regular mortals call "success"... There is a time when the only light you see at the end of the tunnel is the C train.
I must say it is not a wrist-slashing matter, neither the dreaded "middle-age crisis". No, no, no. I have that dealt with since I was in my 30's. It's being stuck in this stinky rat-hole without a chance to throw everything to the dogs just because I'm tied by my household responsibilites. Were I single, I would've quit this shitty place months ago, but I decided, years ago, that I wasn't gonna let my partner suffer for any bad decisions I had made.
But going back to the original point, I've been fighting depression for around a month now. What pisses me is that I'M NOT A DEPRESSIVE PERSON. I hadn't been this blue since my 20's, for God's sake! But still here I am, fighting with all my might these horrible sensation of having become a total loser, unable even to tie her shoes right.
Sigh) Anyway, as I said before, I'm not the only one, and people around me (well, my beloved ones, I mean) are not guilty of this. They are not foreced to bear this burden. Sooner or later, I will rise again, like the fiery Phoenix.
I'll try to keep you updated.
And again, THANKS, MIAO!