Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Day 44: Field trip with the Company - A desperate call for help

I do not consider myself either a weak or cowardly person, but recently I’ve found something that has really given me the creeps – a 3-day field trip with my co-workers.

Everything got started with the Big Boss coming up with the idea that a field trip would build up the company’s general performance (as if), so he scheduled this visit to a training facility located in Mineral del Chico County. Up to that moment, everybody was kind of interested but, when he announced in a general meeting that attending was mandatory and that whoever didn’t show up for the trip would get his sacking cheque ready, the spirits started to sink. Sadly, they went straight to the bottom when he pompously announced that the sole purpose of the trip was to crop the personnel and get rid of the “bad elements” (shocked gasp).

Obviously, if we were already pissed for having to spend one of our precious weekends working without payment, that was the last straw. Now everybody is really angry and looking towards this with a really nasty attitude, which only worsens my personal situation.

Given the fact that I define myself primarily as a lone wolf, the sole thought of spending a car trip and a three day stay in the company of people who I regard as total morons has already made me sick with anguish and disgust.

My co-workers listen to trashy music with great pleasure, and bask for hours in dirty jokes which have no sense at all, so you can picture what a joy ride will a three-hour car trip be. Since this trip is intended to “evaluate and improve the productivity”, I’ll have to spend the darned three days forcefully restraining my fierce temper. In addition, they are stealing the precious time I usually devote to my family and my housework. And just to cap it all, we are going to share the rooms. Can you imagine the torture that represents to me?

If I am to be honest, I must say that it is really difficult for me to keep a low profile regarding olfactory traits (to say the least), and my territoriality usually demands privacy. Sharing a room (and a bathroom!) with a total stranger, ready to take note of the smallest flaw to gossip it out is one of the most stressing situations you can place me in. Therefore, as the date slowly approaches, I’m growing more and more frustrated and desperate, since I see no way to worm myself out of it.

If anyone may have an idea for a good excuse out of this, I will be indebted to that person for the rest of my life. I have already tried getting infected (by visiting a young neighbor with the measles) and getting bitten by a dog (it never fell into the provocation). Any idea (which doesn’t include suicide, of course) that helps me preserve my privacy, my dignity and my job will be taken into account at the Gates of Heaven.


Jingo said...

Firstly, it sounds like blackmail if it's without pay.

But look on the brightside - maybe it's one of those business trips where you all go rafting and absailing and canoeing and camping and do other team building activities...

Think of it as a character building experience. That's what I like to think when I'm in an unpleasant situation. I'd try and turn it around to make it seem enjoyable, vaguely...


The Usual Stuff said...

Jingo: Believe me I've done my best to find a bright side on this one, but I found none. I'm familiar with extreme sports, and I enjoy them a lot... with people with the right attitude!
But I'll do my best to follow your advice. (sigh)

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